and here goes my *(@&#$(@* feelings.
If every tear and smile can show how much a person feels, them maybe JUST maybe I can cry a thousand tears to show that Im in pain, I can smile like Im undeniably happy. Honestly, Ive been up since midnight. It’s 11:25 am and yet I dont even want to sleep. Maybe because I dont want to wake up and feel lonely. My eyes are swollen, My heart is beating so fast. I cant even smile. Words doesnt want to come out of my mouth. I want to say Im okay, that Im good, Im cool, BUT I am not OKAY! I want to say I am happy, BUT I am not. I want to be selfish BUT thats not like me.
I hate myself for feeling the way I feel right now, I hate myself for being too nice. Why cant I get mad? Am I coward? Am I being to harsh? I want to make myself believe that everything happens for reason and that God wants me to learn something.
Ive had the best 24 days of my life. Ive felt the best feeling Ive ever had. I dont want this to end, I dont want him out of my life. BUT I dont know what the future holds. I want him to be happy with whatever decision he makes. Be it with me or with someone else. Oh God! I dont even know why Im saying this. every time I say that Im ok, that Im gonna take it easy, Im gonna be okay If he makes his it the other way. BUT I have to make myself ready to face my fears and that is being dumped, rejected and left alone. Srsly, Ive waited for 4 fucking years to find someone who’s worth every tear I cried and worth the wait, and then I met him. Someone, who made me feel special and loved. He made me change my ways. He made me love myself more and If we go separate ways, I’ll wait till the day God decides for our fate. Id like to think that We’ll be there for each other when that time comes. Id still say YES. Id still welcome him back to my life. And If not, Ill wait for God’s chosen one. Kinaya ko ngang maghintay ng apat na taon, siguro naman kakayanin ko pa. Hindi naman siguro ako mahirap mahalin, hindi naman ako masamang babae, mabuti naman akong tao kaya Im positive pa din na bibigyan ako ni God ng someone na handang manindigan at makipaglaban para sakin.
My Superhero, Lets make the most out of every time God is giving us. Thank You and Im praying for your genuine Happiness. You know me and You know how much I value what we have. :))
Dear Lord, I pray for every broken people. for every person in need. May your guidance be always with them. your light will lead them to the right path. Every tear that rolls down in their cheeks, every frown that comes from their face. let it disappear. Let Love lead the way. Amen ♥
Just because a person smiles all the time, doesn’t mean their life is perfect. That smile is a symbol of hope & strength.
(Source: joanishlove)
awwww..
he doesn’t make me cry like you do.. awts! :(
